And Now for Something Really Surprising

Get this! I actually agree with something written over at Rapture Ready.

Ron Graham pens a tangential critique of some book I will never read because it says something so dumb that reading it will not add one useful bit of knowledge. That is where we agree.

Ron and I agree that evangelism is not dead. Evangelism will exist as long as there are living Christians.

But as for the rest of his post... Well need I really comment?

Enjoy for yourselves.

Nekkid Ladies and Dick Cheney

There is a news story floating through the internets about a photo on the White House web site showing a reflection of a naked woman in Dick Cheney's sunglasses. (Example here).

(Link here to original)


The problem is this, it is not a person at all. It is a reflection of Cheney's hand holding his fly fishing rod.

While a good story and I am sure it will continue to make the rounds, it is nothing in reality.

Sorry.

(P.S. is there any reality, or space-time dimension, in which a woman would want to be naked in front of Dick Cheney?? The cost of that would dwarf anything Elliot Spitzer ever paid for sex....)

[Late, late update:] But I will say this much, what is up with his teeth? Are the millions he reaped from Halliburton not enough to get his teeth cleaned and capped?

More on Smog -- Our President

In my last post regarding smog and pollution, I referred to nameless "conservative Republicans" as being the source. Today we have a name.. And that name is Bush.

The Environmental Protection Agency agreed to weaken an important part of its new smog requirements after being told at the last minute that President Bush preferred a less stringent approach, according to government documents.

I guess this is consistent with the Bush Doctrine: Make you safer by making you less safe (so many of you die and then there's less of you to make safe, making it easier -- or something like that. Yeah, I don't understand it either). Here's how it works:

The memos and documents indicate that EPA officials had wanted to make the public welfare standard more stringent than the health standard, although still not as protective as some scientists had recommended.But the White House insisted on making both standards identical, according to the documents. When EPA officials balked, the issue went to Bush, who sided with his budget office.
The White House defended Bush's action.
"This is not a weakening of regs (regulations) or standards," White House deputy press secretary Tony Fratto said Friday. "But it was an effort to make the standards
consistent. There's no question we have an interest in how federal regs impact communities."
Fratto said the new standards are the "most stringent smog standards in history" and that communities will have a hard time meeting them. He described the area where Bush intervened as 'a technical matter' and said he acted on the advice of the Justice Department.

So I see, the Justice Department and the budget office are making final decisions about public health and science. I guess they all stayed at a Holiday Inn Express. ...Not.

Saint Patty's Day Ruined this Year?

In case you are unaware, St. Patrick's Day falls on Monday of Holy Week this year. Within the Catholic Church there is a moldy old rule that says that this holy day, therefore, cannot be celebrated; Holy Monday precedes in importance. See this CNN article for more. The money quote:

For the first time since 1940, St. Patrick's Day will fall during Holy Week, the sacred seven days preceding Easter.
Because of the overlap, liturgical rules dictate that no Mass in honor of the saint can be celebrated on Monday, March 17, according to the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops.
But a few Roman Catholic leaders are asking for even more moderation in their dioceses: They want parades and other festivities kept out of Holy Week as well.

Maybe its just that cynical streak in me, but does this strike you as odd as well? I mean God, in all his perfection, couldn't come up with a way to honor a saint, a man who did His bidding, every year? Was God snoozing at the time He should have been guiding the paths of men who made up the rules for Holy Week and for when St. Patrick's Day would be celebrated? And could a slip-up in perpetual scheduling of the celebration of a man of God be considered a flaw in the character of God?

Simply food for thought..

War On Christmas; The Secret Inside Job

You know for some reason I just realized that there are some from the inside who are working to undermine Christmas and, via secularization, eliminate Christmas. Just consider the "pro-"Christmas song, "We Wish You A Merry Christmas".

But then there is this line following:
"...And a Happy New Year"

Get that? This song that is supposedly pro-Christmas, because it actually mentions Christmas (and mentioning Christmas is what the war-on-Christmas fighters like Bill O'Reilly and John Gibson want most) slides in through the back door a very secular message, "and a happy new year" Since there is nothing about Jesus wrapped up in this whole New Year thing, then secularism has been snuck into a Christmas song!

Maybe someone should warn Bill O' and let him know that there are some Christmas songs which should not be sung, or even listened to, if he wants to win his war on Christmas...

hehe

Here is another great Christmas ditty (warning, it is Monty Python's Eric Idle, thus replete with the f-bomb)

I Just Came Across This On YouTube...

I laughed, I cried, I remembered my childhood at Catholic school...



The New new Buddy Jesus, for today's "Halo III" youth...

The Best Line Evah!

I hate to simply cut and paste... But this has to be:

Besides, if Hillary Clinton becomes president she'll sign an Executive Order forcing K-Lo to marry a lesbian, get impregnated by Bill, and then they'll abort the baby on a podcast which Ann Althouse will drunkblog.

All glory goes to TBogg.

Rapture Index of Rapture Ready

One thing I religiously (pun intended) check on is the Rapture Index from Rapture Ready. It occurred to me that I should 'correct' it to reflect reality, and then find out where we really stand on the rapture index. So below is my correction to the index. The first number is the one I assign based on the facts of the world. The second +/- number is the difference between my number and that of Rapture Ready. Following that is my brief explanation of why I assigned the number I did. Any thoughts or adjustments you think I should make to this revised index, please leave in comments.


False Christs 0 -3 All there have ever been are wackos claiming to be christ (ala David Korresh)
Occult 0 -2 The only occult action has been Christian women killing their children in the name of God (and being declared incompetent)
Satanism 0 -3 Nothing in this category makes it a zero
Unemployment 3 +1 Even in the world's current economy, most of the world is employed.
Inflation 2 -1 Most of the world's inflation is contained
Interest Rates 4 +1 The US credit crunch is causing major problems in financial markets
The Economy 3 -1 The economy is stalling based on the housing market and credit problems, but the overall world economy is stable
Oil Supply/Price 3 -2 Oil remails at a stable price, and the world's economy has seemed to absorb its new higher priced stability
Debt and Trade 3 +0 This category will always remain at a 3 because what's good for one country is bad for another
Financial unrest 4 +0 The credit crunch has world markets jittery
Leadership 3 -1 Bush is the de facto world leader and his ability to lead is questionable based on his intellectual capibilities.
Drug abuse 1 -1 Drug abuse had declined over the last decade while liberals were running the US, but now that conservatives are in control, Afghanistan is producing record poppy crops
Apostasy 0 -4 No action in this category (because no Christian can define what apostasy is without other Christians denying it)
Supernatural 0 -1 Nothing that has a cause outside of nature has occurred
Moral Standards 2 -1 Hypocrasy runs rampant within the Republican party regarding sex.
Anti-Christian 0 -3 No action in this category which wasn't originally initiated by Christians causes this category to be zero
Crime Rate 1 -4 Crime fluctuates year-over-year, but remains largely unchanged.
Ecumenism 0 -4 Papal decrees chastizing Protestants needs to be watched, but again, who's the correct Christians and who are wrong?
Globalism 0 -4 There is no movement towards globalism which hasn't been the norm for millennia
Tribulation Temple 0 -2 No Temple exists and none is planned
Anti-Semitism 1 -3 Only Christians are anti-Semitic these days, and since they "must be right" then this isn't an issue. Muslims are neutral at this point.
Israel 2 -3 Calm pervades the land of Israel as the Palistinians are having internal strife
Gog (Russia) 2 -3 Impotent as they have been for over a decade
Persia (Iran) 1 -4 Much talk, no action. About as dangerous as Iraq shortly before we invaded.
The False Prophet 0 -3 No false prophets leading the faithful astray
Nuclear Nations 2 -2 Nuclear weapons still exist and pose a threat as long as they do
Global Turmoil 2 -3 War in Iraq and Afghanistan, turmoil in Africa
Arms Proliferation 0 -4 Stable
Liberalism 0 -4 no liberalism detected anywhere in power
The Peace Process 0 -2 slow, but outside of the wars, stable
Kings of the East 0 -4 No threat
Mark of the Beast 0 -3 Nonexistent
Beast Government 0 -3 Nonexistant
The Antichrist 0 -2 None found
Date Settings 0 -2 Only the doomsday-mongers are setting any dates
Volcanoes 0 -4 Nothing unusual
Earthquakes 0 -5 Nothing unusual
Wild Weather 2 -3 Global warming is creeping into our "normal" weather
Civil Rights 3 +0 Still many groups denied rights that everyone else enjoys
Famine 2 -2 Stable, there is always someplace where famine exists
Drought 0 -4 Nothing critical as of yet
Plagues 0 -3 No activity
Climate 5 +2 Global warming is being denied by many anti-scientists and those in power
Food Supply 2 -2 Tight but controllable for the moment
Floods 2 -3 Areas prone to flooding are being flooded. The severity is getting worse due to global warming

Index total 55

Noah's Ark Challenge

You know what I would like to see? I would like to see some creationists/biblical fundamentalists do some actual research for once. Conduct a scientific experiment which is designed to test their theory that the world is only 6,000 years old and that the bible is literally true. One such test would not be hard to set up, would not be overly expensive, would not be difficult to conduct, and its results would go a long way to proving the literal truth of the bible. It would be unique in this way, as it is one of the few instances found in the bible of something required for a young earth, and that we can test today. I am of course, referring to the great flood and Noah's Ark. The Bible gave specifics as to the design of the ark, its purpose, its precise contents, and its length of use. This little experiment would be something right up the alley of "scientific" creationist groups such as Answers in Genesis. (read their current article.)

The experiment I refer to is this: build a ark, sail it for a year, and come out with all occupants alive and ready to breed. It is simple enough, the bible gives precise details as to the shape, size and construction of the ark. So it can be reproduced. Simple, neat, and evidenciary.

I call it a challenge, because of the obvious: No bible literalist would ever actually do it. Take AiG for example, they would much rather talk about what could have happened and never test it so that if it were, God Forbid, to fail then they would not have to explain how the bible could be wrong.

But let us set up this experiment and see what we have. First let us look at the construction of the ark: (Genesis 6:13-22 NKJV)

13 And God said to Noah, “The end of all flesh has come before Me, for the earth is filled with violence through them; and behold, I will destroy them with the earth. 14 Make yourself an ark of gopherwood; make rooms in the ark, and cover it inside and outside with pitch. 15 And this is how you shall make it: The length of the ark shall be three hundred cubits, its width fifty cubits, and its height thirty cubits. 16 You shall make a window for the ark, and you shall finish it to a cubit from above; and set the door of the ark in its side. You shall make it with lower, second, and third decks. 17 And behold, I Myself am bringing floodwaters on the earth, to destroy from under heaven all flesh in which is the breath of life; everything that is on the earth shall die. 18 But I will establish My covenant with you; and you shall go into the ark—you, your sons, your wife, and your sons’ wives with you. 19 And of every living thing of all flesh you shall bring two of every sort into the ark, to keep them alive with you; they shall be male and female. 20 Of the birds after their kind, of animals after their kind, and of every creeping thing of the earth after its kind, two of every kind will come to you to keep them alive. 21 And you shall take for yourself of all food that is eaten, and you shall gather it to yourself; and it shall be food for you and for them.” 22 Thus Noah did; according to all that God commanded him, so he did.

Thus we have the basic plan. Build an ark of dimensions 300x50x30 cubits, with only one window and one door. The outside and inside shall be pitched and its occupants will consist of 8 humans and pairs of every animal type ("kind"). First, the dimensions of the ark, in more modern terms is 438 feet long by 73 feet wide by 46 feet high. That gives us a specific volume, 1,470,804 cubic feet. Certainly plenty of room to work with, but not so big that it cannot be built using modest funds. As for the gopherwood, well, I think it would be allowable to use another type of wood as a substitute; just not the treated wood we use to build houses, etc. Treating wood to be resistant to water, fungi, barnicles, etc. is expressly forbidden.



So now we have the basics of our experiment, a boat made of some natural wood, with pre-specified dimensions and only one window and one door. The next step is to fill it. We already have the need for 8 humans, and that will easily be supplied by some God-fearing Christians the AiG supplies. The animals that will populate the ark seems to be the next logical step. Since we no longer have dinosaurs or many of the other species ("kinds" as AiG prefers) due to extinction, it would only be fair to allow a generous substitution of of "kinds". I certainly would be agreeable to that easing on the restraints.

[Update:] One issue I neglected to address was the nature of the great flood itself. From a purely mechanical physics point of view, the flood waters would have to have been very violent, much more so than today's harshest hurricanes. In addition, the temperature of the floodwaters due only to the kinetic energy released from the deluge would raise the temperature of the water to boiling. The ark was, according to the bible, covered in pitch. Pitch in boiling water becomes very gooey and much more likely to bead up. This would have the effect of greatly reducing its ability to make the ark watertight.

I think that given the nature of today's animal kingdom, endangered and threatened species and all that, that we could further limit the varying "kinds" put on this neo-ark. We will allow only non-threatened species on board. The only real concern is that there be a fair representation of both carnivores and herbivores on board as well as parasitic species. Providing adequate food and water for everyone will be up to the decisions of the AiG and the 8 volunteers. AiG as well as many other Creationist organizations have written extensively on how this could have been done, so I will allow them their expertise on that matter. My only constraint is that the ark be fully self-contained, and only have one window and one door.



Since it is spelled out in the Bible, that this ark was completely self-sustaining for one year, this experiment must also be completely self-sustaining for one year. Here are some other issues which I think need be addressed and are vital for the success (or failure) of this experiment.

1. Since the Bible does not specify the number of "kinds" of animals, and is unclear as to whether there were just pairs of all animals, of pairs of all unclean animals except birds, and the clean animals and birds went in pairs of 7 males and females, then the best estimates of the Aig and other creationist sources be used for this number. Some estimates range from over 6,000 "kinds" to under 3,000 "kinds". I will happily accept the lower number for this experiment, as long as a representative number of carnivore and herbivores are present (along with parasitic species). For example, only two earthworms are allowed on board (unless they are also stored solely as food and not as a preservatory "kind").

2. Creationists speculate that that many, if not all, of the "kinds" brought on board were young and not adult animals. This is allowable.

3. Since many species are now extinct, substitute species are clearly acceptable.

4. Since many species alive still today are endangered or threatened, substitute species are again acceptable.

5. Again, since we do not know exactly how many, or exactly what 'kinds' of species were on board the ark, it is acceptable for the AiG to make their best guess, and use surrigate species in their places. This does mean that carnivore be replaced by carnivore, and herbivore be replaced by herbivore. This seems more than fair and adequately scientific for the purposes of this experiment, since the inhabitants of this neo-ark will not need to repopulate the planet after their fantastic voyage.

[Update II:] 6. Regarding aquatic animals, the conditions of the flood would cause all aquatic animals to die as well (also as God intended, since He did say all living things on earth), since both the PH and the saline content would be radically altered, then it seems that aquatic animals would need to be placed on the ark as well. This includes the bottom dwellers too.

As for technology and the internal workings of this neo-ark; again it will be left to the AiG to set up. I think the rules for this should be both simple and honest:
1. No modern technology be used in regards to the care and feeding of the animals, only technology available to Noah during his time is allowable. However, the AiG can determine what this technology is, given that they state it before the experiment begins.

2. Because the experiment is to last a year (as according to the Bible, Noah's voyage lasted) and due to modern nautical regulations, some emergency equipment should be placed on this neo-ark: An emergency radio.

3. If the occupants get sick or need emergency attention the experiment shall be deemed a failure. If there is a massive problem with their precious cargo, then the experiment should be called off, and deemed a failure.

4. This experiment can be repeated as many times as needed until AiG is convinced that Noah's ark is a myth.


I look forward to learning the results of this scientific experiment to prove the validity of Noah's ark and the vindication of AiG soon, as I know, as do you all, that AiG is really a science outfit and not simply a Christian apologetics evangelical operation.

Please allow me to put this in my own terms. I, as a scientist, see just how difficult it would be to design and build a spaceship to keep just 8 humans alive for the journey to mars and back. That craft would certainly have to be self sustaining, providing not just its own food, but oxygen and water as well. This type of endeavor is beyond our capabilities even today. Yet somehow, I'm supposed to believe that not only was this done thousands of years ago, it was done including the precursors ('kinds') of every single species on earth, living and long since extinct. And yet AiG would have all you believe that I'm the one who is unscientific and wrong. It just boggles the mind. All you fundamentalist Christians out there: put your beliefs where your mouth is, build the thing and prove yourselves right. It is not my responsibility to accept your outrageous claims without one shred of proof. Science provides proof for its claims on a regular, everyday, basis. Isn't it about time you did the same?

[Update Sept 13]: I found this interesting web site. Apparently they are building an "exact" replica of Noah's ark as a building. Unfortunately though, it requires concrete and steel. Not exactly materials you'd find thousands of years ago. P.S. I have no idea if this is real or a hoax, but it is funny nontheless.

The absolute last update: I make a few closing comments here.

Special Rights, Christian Style

One thing conservative Christian groups love to do is rant about "special rights" being given to gays. Just check out how obsessed about gays such groups as Coral Ridge Ministries and American Family Association are (the list of anti-gay Christians goes on and on). Their favorite key words are "thought crimes" and the venerable "special rights."

But what about Christian groups themselves? Do they feel they deserve special rights? You betcha! Read this brief note the AP released about a Christian fraternity in Tampa Florida. The "gotcha" lines are these:

According to the lawsuit filed in U.S. District Court in Gainesville, UF officials have told Beta Upsilon Chi that it can't be registered as an on-campus student group because only men are allowed to join, which amounts to prohibited sex discrimination.

And:

And the suit says Beta Upsilon Chi is not allowed to join the off-campus Greek system of fraternities and sororities because the fraternity requires its members to be Christians. The organization that governs UF's Greek system prohibits religious discrimination.

Now all other organizations have to follow the rules, but this distinctly Christian organization does not want to, so they filed a lawsuit to get a special right granted only for them. Hypocrisy seems to be a hallmark of Christianity.

Rapture Comedy

I'm only going to write one more post concerning the silliness of Rapture Ready. See this current article: Global RECALL NOTICE

It is unsigned, so I cannot put a name or a logical connection to it. Take this ingenious opening:

The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.

The "Maker" made defective products. And the products are to blame! Repent! Repent!!!

This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.

Of course the manufacturer of the original model isn't to blame, the original models have only themselves to blame to being so stupid as to allow themselves to be created flawed.

This defect has been technically termed "Subsequential Internal Non-Morality," or more commonly known as SIN, as it is primarily expressed.

I would call it SINM, as that is just as meaningful as sin...

Some other symptoms include:

1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion

Or as I like to put them:
1. Just where are we headed in Iraq?
2. Dick Cheney is the spawn of satan
3. So being made from dirt is better than being made of primidorial soup
4. Who knew that atheists were all suicidal and all Christians were signing up to go die in Iraq?
5. Yes, "war in Iraq" = peace, and desiring an end to war in iraq = violence and warmongering
6. ??? I think the only confusion here is believing in some "god" who can only "save" humans, if he commits suicide to himself as a blood sacrifice to his own vanity. Yeah, that's real sane.
7. Fear od hell = not fearful, fear of religions = fearfulness. Ok, well, he has me there. I have a great fear of religious zealots like this guy blowing up the world, certainly greater than any fear of some imagined eternal hell.
8. Is worship of the Indianapolis Colts considered idolatry?
9. Yes, all Christians should stand up, take up arms and kill, kill kill... Wait, or not. Is not killing for God considered rebellion, or is killing for God considered rebelling against that whole peace thing. Sheesh, now I'm more confused.

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect. The Repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.

Cool, we all are fee-free!!!! But I still am unclear on the whole manufacturer is not responsible for the flawed design thing. That's like saying the Ford Pintos were at fault for being flawed, and not Ford, for Ford's design was perfect....

The number to call for repair in all areas is

P-R-A-Y-E-R.

Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control

...Because only a Christian is capable of possessing these qualities. Oh, and according to the Christian, you'd better possess these qualities, or they will hate, fight, show no patience or kindness, be nasty, unfaithful, aggressive and lack all self control towards you. (And if you happen to be gay, Whoa! look out, death by dragging behind a car is too good for you). But it is the atheist who is a bad, bad person.

Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth), for further details on the use of these fixes.

Yes, and for the proper methods to use to execute those who do not agree (or agree, but mistakenly think eating shrimp is ok, but being gay is damnable).

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.

Like guessing which Christian sect to believe in (and reject all others).

DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will need to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.

Again, guessing the wrong Christian sect to adhere to is functionally no different than running around as a gay Muslim abortion doctor.

This has been brought to you by S.T.U.P.I.D. Strict Translations (of) Uber- Pius Iconic Doctrines

Some Home State Humor

What can I say? Well It is centered around the great state of Tennessee...



I just wonder how many years will pass before Ken Ham in considered the next Joseph Smith? Well Anyway, as a native Tennessean, I was amused by the TN state flag backdrop. Maybe there is some down home blasphemy left in my home state after all.

Bulldog Alert! More fun with ChristianExodus

Yes, it is true, I just don't know if I can let this organization go without sinking my teeth into them any deeper. (And again, I want to stress that I like this org, and want them to hang around for years more, so that I have plenty of material for the future.)

Last time I mentioned a timeline. If you took a look at it, you know it is too easy a target. Have fun with it as a mental exercise, but I will leave it alone in all its grandstanding glory. What I want to look at is their "legal" Position Statement. The sheer zaniness of this is immediately clear for any first year law student, or any human with at least a semi-functioning brain.

First off, their intention:

ChristianExodus.org is an association of Christians who no longer wish to live under the unjust usurpation of powers by the federal government, and therefore resolves to formally disassociate itself from this tyrannical authority, and return to the model of governance of a constitutional republic. We seek a republican government constrained by constitutionally delegated powers. If this cannot be achieved within the United States, then we believe a
peaceful withdrawal from the union to be the last available remedy.

Ouch! Who knew that Interstates free of potholes was an abomination to God? Or maybe CEs Christians all are personally willing to donate their time charitably to pour concrete and build bridges in lieu of paying taxes.

South Carolina constitutional reforms:

ChristianExodus.org seeks to include many of our positions in a new constitution in South Carolina. For example, some constitutional guarantees ought to include the protection of human life at conception, the Ten Commandments as the foundation of law, the prohibition of any redefinition of marriage, and a strong reserve clause (reservation of undelegated powers to local government).

Yes, stoning to death any Muslim for the crime of believing in "other gods" sounds reasonable for a new "constitutional republic" as mandated by the first commandment of the venerable Ten Commandments.

Regarding the U.S. Constitution:

A simple distinction [between rights and privledges] can be made by asking oneself the question, "Is what I seek guaranteed to me by my Creator?" Some examples of rights include: life, liberty, pursuit of happiness, defense of private property, self-defense (bear arms), religious belief, etc.

God (the creator) granted the rights of liberty and religious belief? The authors of CE's position statement must have been on LSD when they wrote this. What did they sleep through their study of Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, (Numbers), and Deuteronomy? All God did then (not to mention the next books regarding Israel's Judges and Kings) was kill outright all non-believers and those who chose liberty over complete submission to God.

And self defense? Well it is good to know that the Canaanites were morally right and the Hebrews were morally wrong, according to the master theologians of CE.

Then there's "pursuit of happiness".. Is not a gay man who pursues happiness a partaker of this right? Apparently, pursuit of happiness is just a euphemism for being utterly miserable.

Then there's the issue of private property. How much of the then Israel actually belonged to the Hebrews? If you were to bother to read the bible, you would learn that the answer is zero. It was all stolen via warfare and conquest. How can that be interpreted to mean a respect for private property? Just Askin'.

Next, there's this piece of excrement that defies all reason, either Christian pretzel logic or actual rationality:

ChristianExodus.org believes government may regulate behavior so long as the regulation does not violate unalienable rights of citizens. Legislation outlawing certain behaviors must reflect the will and values of the majority of the governed. It is within the unalienable rights of every community to define a set of behaviors that may be considered detrimental, unhealthy, unsafe, criminal, and undesirable for the community. To deny a community the right to govern such behaviors and reflect the values of the majority of its citizens is to impose tyrannical oppression on the community and deny its fundamental rights.

Someone explain to me how "pursuit of happiness" is an unalienable right, yet it can be limited by the whims of some (any) majority. I would really like to know how, if given the CE gets their society, that a Muslim majority moves into one Christian town, and votes to make Islam its official religion they could possibly complain? They could not, but you all know damn well they they would simply deny it. Try this mental experiment: Transplant Las Vegas to South Carolina. Now using CE's logic, they would, by their very own definition, be perfectly happy with that. This perfectly illustrates just how silly and dishonest they really are.

Notice how they twist 180 degrees what tyrannical oppression means. They say that a "majority" has the right to do anything they commonly vote (agree on) upon the minority -- yet that is somehow not tyranny. To them, tyranny means the minority having the right to live their lives in "the pursuit of happiness" in spite of the majority's wishes. Funny, I never before knew that oppression was the act of expressing the "unalienable rights" given by their God.

I really have to wonder how the leaders of CE would feel if America held a national referendum and the majority allowed abortion to continue. Would they issue a news release saying that they no longer considered abortion an issue, since America had spoken out against their position and drop it entirely as an issue. I really doubt it.

Their final statement on the purpose of government is the wackiest of all:

Government does not exist to redistribute wealth, to create means of production, to usurp the authority of the family, or to regulate the church. Moreover, the state's authority is subservient to the Creator's authority, and when in conflict, government must adjust its position to conform to God's natural law. This authority structure is imperative because should the state be considered supreme, our rights are no longer secure.

Pardon me here, but didn't their very own supreme dictator, Jesus Christ, state on more than one occasion that redistributing wealth was the moral thing to do? But don't take my word for it, take the Supreme Dictator's word on it: Luke 12:33, "Sell what you have and give alms; provide yourselves money bags which do not grow old, a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, where no thief approaches nor moth destroys." Matthew 19:21 "Jesus said to him, 'If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.'"

I believe I can safely state that our rights are only no longer secure if these Christians gain control of our government.

Under the Status of Government banner, we have this jewel of compassion:

Americans have lost the ability to distinguish rights from privileges. American government routinely taxes the private property of producers and redistributes the revenue to individuals who have not earned it.

You see, the poor deserve the God-Given Right to live out on the street, starve and die of disease because the government has no right to supply these services. Only if the poor submit and give over their own personal religious beliefs to the Christian charities do they have the right to shelter, food and medical care.

Next:

Our federal government does not allow protection of the unalienable right to life of Americans in their mothers' wombs.

Here again we have the prime anti-abortion call. That being that a speck of cells (i.e. life just after conception) constitutes a full-fledged human being. I am not going to get into an abortion debate here, other than to say this: Considering the fact that there are many spontaneous abortions (fertilized eggs failing to implant in the womb) does that make God the biggest abortion doctor ever? Read the Pentateuch. God commands the killing of babies, pregnant women, and young children. Not even abortion doctors advocates this. Abortion is not only justified in the Bible, but intanticide, genocide, and general murder are advocated. At least we anti-bible types have better morals than the Judeo-Christian God.

And next:

American courts routinely violate the unalienable rights of individuals and communities to express their religious beliefs.

This is flat out false. No American (or any individual on American soil) has ever been denied their rights to religious freedom.. With the exception of Mormons who were told that they could not be polygamous. At least, according to CE, Utah should be allowed to return to their practice of polygamy since it would be voted so by the majority of its citizens. The problem with this is that it would invalidate their argument regarding "traditional marriage."

And next next:

The state of Massachusetts flagrantly declares that its authority is supreme to the Creator's when it redefines the God-ordained institution of marriage.

See above. God's institution of marriage is clearly laid out in the Old Testament. So just how many wives and concubines did David have, or Solomon? Oops! Traditional marriage isn't so traditional after all. And what about the "traditional" ban on interracial marriages throughout the South? Just what is a traditional marriage according to CE? I guess its all in what the current (non-traditional) thinking is. And what about the opinion of the majority? CE says that matters, but here they say it doesn't, their most recent concept of "tradition" is all that matters. I guess contradiction is a "right" to be written into CE's idea of their new Constitution.

Under the heading, "Intentions for Government" we find this gem:

Local government offers people choices and variety by way of easy relocation to a nearby community more in tune with their beliefs. Decentralized power promotes competition between communities that desire to attract new residents. That government is best which governs least and resides closest to the people.

That first sentence really is saying this, if your neighbors don't like you because you believe differently, then your only option is to uproot your family and move out. The fact that you have a job, friends, roots, means nothing, GET OUT! So what if you can't find a job in the community that does agree with your beliefs, that is YOUR FAULT!

The last sentence is the most absurd of all. It says that the absolute best government is no governement at all -- anarchy.


Religious freedom:

At no time in American jurisprudence has religious persecution been acceptable. Nor does ChristianExodus.org believe any tenets of the Christian faith promote persecution of other faiths. Our organization stands decidedly in favor of religious freedom and liberty for all human beings so long as their religious behaviors do not violate the God-given rights of others. Again, ChristianExodus.org will not support any efforts on the part of government to violate the unalienable right to freedom of religious belief. People of all faiths must have the same rights and freedoms guaranteed to them under law.

The only thing that can be said here is that honesty and straighforwardness are not values held CE. For they are giving religious freedom to all here (in violation of their other statments I have pointed out above) and yet also claim that the majority has the right to dictate morals. So what happens when a religion says that same-sex marriage is not only acceptable, but are performed under the auspices of the religious leaders. Then, by their claim here, same-sex marriage (i.e. their non-"traditional" marriage) would by default be acceptable to government.

Homosexuality:

ChristianExodus.org recognizes that homosexuality is an unhealthy, unsafe, detrimental behavior that affects all citizens in a community, not just the participants. Additionally, sexual conduct outside the bonds of marriage is not a God-given right. Therefore, homosexual activity is a behavior that a state may regulate and legislate against.

Of course, using this logic, then all pre-marrital and extra-marrital sex would also be illegal and punishable by jail time. Good luck funding all the jails that will be necessary to house everone who breaks that law without taxing residents. And to make this extra-silly, consider this: in violation of the no-redistribution of wealth via taxes, building jail cells and paying for food for the convicts would no be possible since those convicts should be paying their own way. This would turn convicts into forced laborers (i.e. slaves).

Furthermore, since homosexuality is not considered a sin by all Christian religions, then the religious freedom of those homosexuality-allowing Christians would have to be limited, in violation of the God-given right to religious freedom.

Religious displays in public:

Communities have a right to express values consistent with the majority of their citizens. This includes the public display of religious symbols such as crosses and the Ten Commandments. This communal right rests upon freedom of religious exercise and freedom of speech. However, there is no right to freedom from exposure to religious expression. To suggest otherwise would automatically negate and violate the unalienable rights of religious freedom and free speech. In other words, a religious minority in a community does not have a right to deny religious expression to the majority. As with all other communal decisions, the values and expressions of a community will inevitably result from popular will at the ballot box. If a religious minority does not like the decisions made by the majority, they may either relocate to another community or attempt to change the minds of the electorate and become the majority.

Finally, a fundie Christian organization who says outright that atheism is not a religion!

But it would be fun to watch all the CE members squirm under the blowback from their rules they set up. Imagine a Community taken over by CE later being re-taken by Catholics who then vote to place Mary statues and actual crucifixes (not crosses) all over town. And making "Hail Mary" the official prayer before all official government functions.

Education:

If public education exists, local control of education is paramount. Funding of local schools should come exclusively from local revenue. The local community alone should generate the policies and values expressed in schools.

Science and Math are right out the door. The Bible is God's science and math books. God set the value of pi=3.0. Man is the guilty party who redefined pi=3.14159.... CE's civil engineers will used only the God-ordained value of pi in their design of buildings and bridges. Biology and Medicine will become forbidden topics as God explained how to cure the sick and how all animals came to be and propagate.

Oh, and let's not forget literature. Instead of listing banned books, public schools will list acceptable books. Those books acceptable will be: The Bible and that is all.

Interests of minority in South Carolina:

If secession is effected in South Carolina, there will be a minority of unionists in the state. The under girding principle in a representative form of government is that majority rules. It then becomes the responsibility of the minority to relocate or change the policies of the state through the ballot box. It would be a great injustice to suggest that the preference of the minority ought to prevail over that of the majority.

In other words all minority only have the rights given them at the whim of the majority. If the majority deems that all members of the minority be rounded up and marked via tatoo and special clothing, to be later rounded up and placed in specialized "camps" that will be perfectly legal and acceptable to CE -- but only if the majority votes for it at the ballot box.

Religious tests for citizenship:

ChristianExodus.org does not desire the establishment of a theocracy where religious tests are required for citizenship. Also see our position on religious freedom above.

Exactly! CE does not desire a theocracy because a theocracy requires that God be the king of the government and its citizens, and CE knows that while God is king, he is not king of government. Or something like that. I certainly cannot figure out how making religious views and religiously-based morals the only law of the land is not defined as theocracy. I guess they can claim this because they want to write a direct violation of the Ten Commandments into their new Constitution, that being religious freedom and worshipping other gods.

16th Amendment:

We hold that the various States should repeal the 16th Amendment, which grants Congress the power to directly tax the people. Direct taxation of the people is contrary to the original intent of the Union and deprives the States of a powerful check on federal excess.

I guess that by this logic, then CE fully endorses the repeal of the 13th Amendment and a return to slavery as originally provisioned in the Constitution. This is to say nothing about the amendments allowing blacks, women and 18 year olds to vote. Since none of that was in the Constitution originally either.

Wouldn't that make a great recruitment advertisement for CE?? "Come join us in South Carolina. We plan to strip all women, blacks and 18 year olds of the right to vote. Oh and we're going to reinstitute slavery too!"

I really have to wonder who at Christian Exodus actually wrote all this garbage. I can only picture an inbred, home-schooled adult who was repeatedly dropped on their head as an infant. That seems to be the only way to produce a person so ignorant and illogical capable of writing this tripe.

Their Motto: "Do Absolutely Nothing"

I have mentioned Christian Exodus before. Believe it or not, I actually kinda, sorta like that organization. Why would you like them, O loyal atheist, jeffperado? Well, the reason is that no matter what, I know that at any time I can go there read up on them, and learn that they have done absolutely nothing in the intervening timespan. They put up new "news," update their timeline, try to sell fake coins, etc. But they never do anything. And that is always good for a hearty laugh.

I thought I'd trot over to their site and see what was new with them after the elections, considering that South Carolina was one of a handful of states which suffered few Republican losses. I thought they'd be ecstatic over that and singing of their triumphs over evil.

But, alas, no such mentions. It seems that even in the wins in South Carolina, they still managed to do nothing at all. I did, however, come across this lovely nugget of comedy gold..

Is It Time For a 3rd Party? (Posted November 11, 2006)

The total implosion of the "Republican" Congress on Tuesday and the GOP sprint toward getting out of Iraq by 2008 to retain the White House raise two more important questions. Will the Republican nominee for president in 2008 be nominally "pro-life" and "pro-marriage" (not like any of them actually are, but their claims allow Religious Right leaders to hide behind lies)? And if the candidate is NOT, what will Falwell, Dobson and Robertson do?

I read this and my heart almost skipped a beat.. I say almost because in the very next instant I remembered this was the Christian equivalent of a chronic pot smoker -- Do nothing all day long but eat and crap. So let's read between the lines and see what was really said:

"Republican" Congress -- God doesn't support losers, and God loves Republicans, so these assclowns must be RINOs. Just because Santorum voted against gays does not make him a real "Republican", he has to be a winner as well.

Will the Republican nominee for president in 2008 be nominally "pro-life" and "pro-marriage" -- Will the "Republican" nominee jettison all this "compassionate" junk and treat women and gays with all the disrespect they deserve?

(not like any of them actually are, but their claims allow Religious Right leaders to hide behind lies)? -- Stoopid Religious Right leaders, they are not real Christians because they support politicians who do exactly what we want, except win.

what will Falwell, Dobson and Robertson do? -- Vote Constitution Party!

I've seen some calls for the leaders of the Religious Right to create a national 3rd party for social conservatives, and I want to register my dissent for such an idea... sort of! Their version of a national 3rd party will involve spending money and resources in all 50 States of the Union (including MA, CA, VT, NY, etc.), a surefire recipe for failure and waste. Furthermore, their party would likely call for compliance with unconstitutional, illegal acts from Washington until such a time as we finally win at the national level - a day never to be seen. Christians, those who actually live, act and believe like true Christians, are outnumbered in America and we'll lose at the national level abysmally.

I've seen some calls for the leaders of the Religious Right to create a national 3rd party for social conservatives, and I want to register my dissent for such an idea... sort of! -- I want to do nothing and then whine about it!

Furthermore, their party would likely call for compliance with unconstitutional, illegal acts from Washington -- Furthermore, their party would likely call for obeying the established law of the land, and we can't have that.

a day never to be seen -- ...because we never do anything.

Christians, those who actually live, act and believe like true Christians, are outnumbered in America -- ...because none of us actually live that way. We just want all our neighbors to live as we tell them to live.

we'll lose at the national level abysmally -- ...because we are infested with them there gays! That, and we never do nuthin'. Damn gay agenda!

Any political party raised up by Christians for defense of Christian principles must be regional and must be built upon Acts 5:29. Any other effort is doomed to failure.

Any political party raised up by Christians for defense of Christian principles must be regional -- Yeah, like regional down to my very single Church.

and must be built upon Acts 5:29 -- Yeah, so I can bang 14 year old girls and them claim that "God told me to do it, so you with your mere human rules can't touch me (I dare you to prove that God didn't tell me this)."

And that is today's edition of Fun with Christian Whining; the "Do Nothing" Organization.

Postscript: On a serious note, Acts 5:29 (which the president of Christian Exodus wants to base the entire rule of law upon) actually says: But Peter and the other apostles answered and said: “We ought to obey God rather than men." This is what Christian Exodus wants to base their entire (new) constitution on. Rule of God, not man. That seems to be a rather risky position, given that Jesus, himself, had this to say about government: "Render therefore to Caesar the things that are Caesar’s, and to God the things that are God’s" [Matthew 22:21 - NKJV]. More proof of the Flanders Effect... Obeying the entire Bible, even the contradictory parts. Although if I were a Christian, I would much rather base my government on Jesus' words, and not those of some Christ Denyin' flunkie like Peter. Whom I might add, was also shot down by Paul as well -- [Galatians 2:9 NKJV] And when James, Cephas, and John, who seemed to be pillars, perceived the grace that was given unto me, they gave to me and Barnabas the right hands of fellowship, and [Galatians 2:11 NKJV] But when Peter was come to Antioch, I withstood him to the face, because he was to be blamed. It seems that this Cephas/Peter fellow was wrong quite often. Is his word the best CE can come up with (outside of the obvious, it would let the leaders do anything they wanted and then get away with it because God told them to do it, and no man can speak to God's commands).


If you want a real good laugh, check out their timeline and plan. Looks like its time for another revision.

The Ultimate Geek (like me)

Not so long ago, about the time that YouTube became overly popular, I vowed that I would never, ever, put a youtube video on my blog.

But today I break that rule (it must be that relativist atheism in me...)



Anyway, this guy is the perfect geek -- I am utterly in love with him (In a totally heterosexual way, of course).

His comic that he refers to is found at:
Ghastly Comic

I just wonder though, if it had been a Chevy hubcap that he used, I would feel the same way -- I am a diehard Moparman after all......